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you must feed on the evil； you must learn to love them in all their filth and degeneracy； and you must thrive on the visions of their evil that will inevitably fill your heart and soul during the kill。
〃Kill the innocent and you will sooner or later e to guilt； and with it you will e to impotence and finally despair。 You may think you are too ruthless and too cold for such。 You may feel superior to human beings and excuse your predatory excesses on the ground that you do but seek the necessary blood for your own life。 But it won't work in the long run。
〃In the long run； you will e to know that you are more human than monster； all that is noble in you derives from your humanity； and your enhanced nature can only lead you to value humans all the more。 You'll e to pity those you slay； even the most unredeemable； and you will e to love humans so desperately that there will be nights when hunger will seem far preferable to you than the blood repast。〃
I accepted this wholeheartedly； and quickly plunged with my Master into the dark underbelly of Venice； the wild world of taverns and vice which I had never； as the mysterious velvet…clad 〃apprentice〃 of Marius De Romanus； really seen before。 Of course I knew drinking places； I knew fashionable courtesans such as our beloved Bianca； but I really didn't know the thieves and murderers of Venice； and it was on these that I fed。
Very soon； I understood what my Master meant when he said that I must develop a taste for evil and maintain it。 The visions from my victims became stronger for me with every kill。 I began to see brilliant colors when I killed。 In fact； I could sometimes see these colors dancing around my victims before I ever even closed in。 Some men seem to walk in red…tinged shadows； and others to emanate a fiery orange light。 The anger of my meanest and most tenacious victims was often a brilliant yellow which blinded me； searing me； as it were； both when I first attacked and while I drank the victim dry of all blood。
I was at the onset a dreadfully violent and impulsive killer。 Having been set down by Marius in a nest of assassins； I went to work with a clumsy fury； drawing out my prey from the tavern or the flophouse； cornering him on the quay and then tearing open his throat as if I were a wild dog。 I drank greedily often rupturing the victim's heart。 Once the heart is gone； once the man is dead； there is nothing to pump the blood into you。 And so it is not so good。
But my Master； for all his lofty speeches on the virtues of humans； and his adamant insistence on our own responsibilities； nevertheless taught me to kill with finesse。
〃Take it slowly；〃 he said。 We walked along the narrow banks of the canals where such existed。 We traveled by gondola listening with our preternatural ears for conversation that seemed meant for us。 〃And half the time； you needn't enter a house in order to draw out a victim。 Stand outside of it； read the man's thoughts； throw him some silent bait。 If you read his thoughts； it is almost a certainty that he can receive your message。 You can lure without words。 You can exert an irresistible pull。 When he es out to you； then take him。
〃And there is never any need for him to suffer； or for blood actually to be spilt。 Embrace your victim； love him if you will。 Fondle him slowly and sink your teeth with caution。 Then feast as slowly as you can。 This way his heart will see you through。
〃As for the visions； and these colors you speak of； seek to learn from them。 Let the victim in his dying tell you what he can about life itself。 If images of his long life trip before you； observe them； or rather savor them。 Yes； savor them。 Devour them slowly as you do his blood。 As for the colors； let them pervade you。 Let the entire experience inundate you。 That is； be both active and utterly passive。 Make love to your victim。 And listen always for the actual moment when the heart ceases to beat。 You will feel an undeniably orgiastic sensation at this moment； but it can be overlooked。
〃Dispose of the body after； or make certain that you have licked away all sign of the puncture wounds in the victim's throat。 Just a little bit of your blood on the tip of your tongue will acplish this。 In Venice dead bodies are mon。 You need not take such pains。 But when we hunt in the outlying villages； then often you may have to bury the remains。〃
I was eager for all these lessons。 That we hunted together was a magnificent pleasure。 I came to realize quickly enough that Marius had been clumsy in the murders he had mitted for me to witness before I'd been transformed。 I knew then； as perhaps I've made plain in this story； that he wanted me to feel pity for these victims； he wanted me to experience horror。 He wanted me to see death as an abomination。 But due to my youth； my devotion to him and the violence done me in my short mortal life； I had not responded as he hoped。
Whatever the case； he was now a much more skilled killer。 We often took the same victim； together； I drinking from the throat of our captive； while he fed from the man's wrist。 Sometimes he delighted in holding the victim tightly for me while I drank all of the blood。
Being new； I was thirsty every night。 I could have lived for three or more without killing； yes； and sometimes I did； but by the fifth night of denying myself…this was put to the test…I was too weak to rise from the sarcophagus。 So what this meant was that； when and if I were ever on my own； I must kill at least every fourth night。
My first few months were an orgy。 Each kill seemed more thrilling； more paralyzingly delicious than the one which had gone before。 The mere sight of a bared throat could bring about in me such a state of arousal that I became like an animal； incapable of language or restraint。 When I opened my eyes in the cold stony darkness； I envisioned human flesh。 I could feel it in my naked hands and I wanted it； and the night could have no other events for me until I had laid my powerful hands on that one which would be the sacrifice to my need。
For long moments after the kill； sweet throbbing sensations passed through me as the warm fragrant blood found all the corners of my body； as it pumped its magnificent heat into my face。
This； and this alone； was enough to absorb me utterly； young as I was。
But Marius had no intention of letting me wallow in blood； the hasty young predator； with no other thought but to glut himself night after night。
〃You must really begin to learn history and philosophy and the law in earnest；〃 he told me。 〃You are not destined for the University of Padua now。 You are destined to endure。〃
So after our stealthy missions were pleted； and we returned to the warmth of the palazzo； he forced me to my books。 He wanted some distance between me and Riccardo and the others anyway； lest they bee suspicious of the change that had occurred。
In fact； he told me they 〃knew〃 about the change whether they realized it or not。 Their bodies knew that I was no longer human； though it might take their minds some time to accept the fact。
〃Show them only courtesy and love； only plete indulgence； but ke