按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页,按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页,按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部!
————未阅读完?加入书签已便下次继续阅读!
I nodded。 〃I remember too。〃
Gregory sat up; watching us both; trying to read our lips; I think。 There was something frantic about the way he tried to decipher what we were saying。 God; please let me help him。 He was so scared。
〃I think of him more like a child; no offense。〃
〃You think more like a parent than a seducer; that's a good thing;〃 Stephen said。 〃Don't apologize for it。〃
Cherry joined us; kneeling on her heels; long body curved in graceful lines。 〃You called Raina in the lupanar without any lust; right?〃
I nodded。 〃I can call Raina's munin; sometimes even if I don't want to; but she always demands a price before she leaves。〃
〃You didn't seduce anyone at the lupanar tonight;〃 she said。
〃No; but I damn near started a fight by hitting Richard; and that was part Raina's doing。 She enjoyed my loss of control; and 。。。 and she was worried about the pack tonight。 She doesn't like what Richard's done。 I think she toned down her demands because of that。〃
〃And she doesn't care about us like she does the wolves。〃
〃No; she doesn't。〃
〃What are you afraid of?〃 Stephen asked。 〃That you'll molest Gregory?〃
I shook my head。 〃No; I'm afraid Raina will。〃
〃You healed Nathaniel in the woods and didn't do anything awful to him;〃 Cherry said。
〃No; but I had Richard and the pack there to balance me; to help me control her through the marks。 Without extra help in that area; Raina's idea of payment can get a little messy。〃
〃Define messy;〃 Stephen said。
〃Sex; violence 〃 I shrugged 〃messy。〃
〃You have the pard here now;〃 Cherry said。 〃You can use us for balance。〃
Truth was; without Micah here I wasn't sure I could do that。 Just as Richard was my door to the wolves; Micah was my door to the leopards。 Or was he? I was treating this like I treated Richard and Jean…Claude; like I was the outsider and they were my ticket in。 But what if I really was the leopard queen? If I really was Nimir…Ra; then I should be able to do this without Micah。 I realized the moment I doubted that; I was still hoping I wasn't going to be furry next full moon。 No matter how much evidence to the contrary; I still didn't believe it。 Maybe I didn't want to believe it。 But I wanted to heal Gregory; that I did want。
I looked at them all and knew Cherry was right。 If I was Nimir…Ra; then I had all I needed to balance me。 If I wasn't Nimir…Ra; then it wouldn't work。 What did we have to lose? I looked at Stephen and Gregory; their mirror faces; their frightened eyes; and knew exactly what we had to lose if I didn't try。
I took the Uncle Mike's sidekick holster plete with Firestar out of the front of my jeans and looked around。 If I was going to be calling on the leopards; I didn't want them having to worry about the gun。 I motioned Claudia the wererat over。 Since I was still kneeling; she towered over me; only two inches shorter than Dolph。 I had to admit it was impressive; even more so because she was a woman。
I handed the holstered gun to her; and she took it。 〃Make sure no one gets shot with it。〃
She frowned down at me。 〃You think someone is going to try and get the gun?〃
〃Me; maybe。〃
The frown deepened。 〃I don't understand。〃
〃Raina's amused by violence。 I don't want to be carrying a gun when I call her munin。〃
Claudia's eyebrows raised。 〃You mean she'd try to get you to use it on some one?〃
I nodded。
〃She's tried before?〃
I nodded again。 〃In Tennessee when I was practicing with the munin; yeah。〃
Claudia shook her head。 〃You didn't seem that worried at the lupanar。〃
〃I can call her once and be okay; probably。 But if I call her too often; too close together; it's like she grows 〃 I hesitated 〃stronger; or maybe I just get tired of fighting。〃
〃She was a bitch when she was alive;〃 Claudia said。
〃Being dead hasn't changed her much;〃 I added。
The tall woman shivered。 〃I'm glad the wererats don't have anything like the munin。 The thought of some entity inside me just creeps me out。〃
〃Me too;〃 I said。
She looked down at me; thoughtful now。 〃I'll keep the gun safe。 Is there anything else Igor and I can do to help?〃
I tried to think of something; but only one thing came to mind。 〃If the leopards can't control me; make sure I don't hurt anyone。〃
〃How bad is this going to be?〃 she asked。
I shrugged。 〃Normally; I wouldn't be this worried; but last time I called her she didn't get her bit of flesh; or sex。 Hitting Richard made her happy; but 。。。 〃 I tried to explain。 〃I called her three times in a row for practice; without molesting or hurting anyone。 My teacher; Marianne; and I both thought it was a sign that I was gaining control of Raina。 Then the fourth time I called her; it was worse than it had ever been。 You either pay as you go with Raina; or you end up owing her; and owing es with interest; and the interest is hell to pay。〃
〃Should you give me the knives; too; then?〃 Claudia asked。
She had a point; no pun intended。 I took the wrist sheaths off; folded them up; and handed them to her。
〃I thought you could control this shit。〃 Caleb was standing just a little behind and to one side of Claudia。 He was looking up at the tall woman as if wondering what she'd do if he tried to climb her。 I almost wanted him to try; because I was pretty sure what would happen; and even more sure that I'd enjoy watching it。 Caleb needed a good lesson from someone。
〃I can。〃
〃Then why all the precautions?〃
I could have told him about the time in Tennessee when Raina's munin nearly started a riot among Verne's pack in a sort of game of rape tag; with me as the rapee; but I didn't。 Instead; I said; 〃If you're not going to be helpful; stand over to the side and shut the fuck up。〃
He opened his mouth as if to protest; but Merle said; 〃Caleb; do what she says。〃 His voice was quiet; a deep rumble of sound; but that mild tone seemed to work on Caleb like a charm。
〃Sure; Merle; anything you say。〃 He went to stand over to one side; near Dr。 Lillian and Igor。
I glanced at Merle。 〃Thanks;〃 I said。
He just bowed his head at me。
Dr。 Lillian said; 〃I take this to mean that you want me to wait on the injection。〃
I nodded。 〃Yeah。〃
She turned and walked back through the sliding glass doors; into the darkened house。 Everyone else stayed where they were; looking at me。 Even Caleb; sulking by the railing with his arms crossed; was still watching the show。
I slipped my shirt off and felt rather than saw all my people react; like wind through a wheat field; involuntary。 I never undressed in front of people unless I absolutely had to。 The black bra I was wearing covered more than most swim suits; but there's something about letting people see you in your underwear that just makes all us good little girls squirm。
〃Black lace; I like it;〃 Caleb said。
I started to say something; but Merle beat me to it。 〃Shut up; Caleb; and don't make me tell you again。〃
Caleb settled back against the rail; arms hugging himself; face crinkled into a sulk that made him look even younger than he was。
〃Go on;〃 Merle said; 〃he won't interrupt again。〃
I looked at him。 It was bad that he kept interfering。 It undermined my authority; but since I wasn't entirely sure I had any authority ove