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〃Not in its present form； but it was here just the same。〃
He leaned back on his elbows。 The movement strained the cloth of his shirt； exposing as much skin as the shirt would allow。 The line of dark hair that started low on his belly peeked just above the cloth。
The room was getting warmer。 I undid the velcro fastenings on the bulletproof vest and slid it over my head。 〃Where do you want me to put this？〃
〃Anywhere you like；〃 he said。 His voice was soft and more intimate than the words themselves。
I walked around to the far side of the bed； away from him； and laid the vest across the satin sheets。
He lay back against the sheets； his black hair framing his pale face to perfection。 Warmer； it was definitely getting warmer in here。
〃Mind if I freshen up？〃
〃Whatever I have is yours； ma petite。 You should know that by now。〃
I backed into the door and opened it with a feeling of relief。 I closed the door without really looking at the bathroom。 When I looked up； I let out a silent wow。
The room was long and narrow。 It had a double sink and mirrors with round white lightbulbs edging it。 The sinks were black marble with white veins running through。 Every faucet； every metal edge； gleamed silver。 The floor was black carpeting。 A half wall of silver and mirrored panels hid the black stool against a black wall。 Another half wall graced the other side。 Then there was the bathtub。 Three marble steps led up to a black bathtub； big enough for four people。 The faucet was a silver swan with outspread wings。 There was no way to take a shower； which was my preferred method； and the swan was a bit much； but other than that； it was lovely。
I sat down on the cool marble edging。 It was nearly five in the morning。 My eyes burned from lack of sleep。 The adrenaline rush of nearly getting killed had long since faded。 What I wanted was to be forted； held； yes； sex was in there somewhere； but that wasn't my highest priority tonight。 I think both Richard and Jean…Claude would say it was never my highest priority； but that was their problem。 Okay； it was our problem。
If it had been Richard stretched out on the bed in the next room； I would have jumped him tonight。 But it wasn't Richard； and once Richard got here； we'd be sleeping in Jean…Claude's bed。 Seemed pretty tacky to have sex for the first time in your other boyfriend's bed。 But it wasn't just the boys suffering from sexual tension； I was drowning； too。
Was Richard right？ Was the fact that Jean…Claude wasn't human the only thing keeping me out of his bed？ No。 Or at least I didn't think so。 Out of Richard's bed？ The answer； sadly； was yes； maybe。
I freshened up and couldn't help checking myself in the mirror。 The makeup had faded a little； but the liner still made my large； dark eyes stand out in dramatic contrast。 The blush was almost gone； and the lipstick had long ago vanished。 I had lipstick in my purse。 I could freshen that at least。 But freshening my lipstick was like admitting I cared what Jean…Claude thought of me。 I did care。 That was the truly scary part。 I did not put on more lipstick。 I walked back into the bedroom as is； let him make of it what he would。
He was leaning on one elbow； watching me as I came through the door。 〃Ma petite； you are beautiful。〃
I shook my head。 〃Pretty； I'll give you； but not beautiful。〃
He cocked his head to one side； sending a wave of hair over one shoulder。 〃Who told you you were not beautiful？〃
I leaned against the door。 〃When I was a little girl； my father would e up behind my mother。 He would wrap his arms around her waist； bury his face in her hair； and say； 'How is the most beautiful woman in the world today？' He said it at least once a day。 She would laugh and tell him not to be silly； but I agreed with him。 To me； she was the most beautiful woman in the world。〃
〃She was your mother。 All little girls think that of their mother。〃
〃Maybe； but two years after she died； Dad remarried。 He married Judith； who was tall and blond and blue…eyed； and nothing like my mother。 If he had really believed my mother was the most beautiful woman in the world； why did he marry some Nordic ice princess？ Why didn't he marry someone small and dark like my mother？〃
〃I don't know； ma petite；〃 he said quietly。
〃Judith had a daughter only a couple of years younger than me。 Then they had Josh together and he was as blond and blue…eyed as the rest of them。 I looked like a small dark mistake in the family photos。〃
〃Your skin is almost as pale as mine； ma petite。〃
〃But I have my mother's eyes and hair。 My hair isn't brunette； it's black。 A woman asked Judith once in front of me if I was adopted。 Judith said； no； I was from her husband's first marriage。〃
Jean…Claude slid off the bed。 He moved towards me； and I had to look at the floor。 I wanted badly to be held； to be forted。 If it had been Richard； I'd have gone to him。 But it wasn't Richard。
Jean…Claude touched my cheek and raised my face until I had to look at him。 〃I have lived for over three hundred years。 In that time； the ideal of beauty has changed many times。 Large breasts； small； thin； curved； tall； short； they have all been the height of beauty at one time or another。 But in all that time； ma petite； I have never desired anyone the way I desire you。〃 He leaned towards me； and I didn't move away。 His lips brushed mine in a gentle kiss。
He took that one last step to press our bodies together； and I stopped him； one hand on his chest； but all I met was bare skin。 The slickness of his cross…shaped burn scar met my fingertips。 I moved my hand and found his heart beating against my palm。 Not an improvement。
He drew back； a breath； and whispered into my mouth； 〃Tell me no； ma petite； and I will stop。〃
I had to swallow twice before I could speak。 〃No。〃
Jean…Claude stepped away from me。 He lay back on the bed as he had earlier； propped on his elbows； his legs from the knees hung off the bed。 He stared at me； daring me to e join him； I think。
I wasn't that stupid。 There was some dark part of me that was tempted。 Lust has less logic than love； sometimes； but it's easier to fight。
〃I have played the mortal for you these many months。 I thought in March when you held my naked body； when you shared blood with me； that it would be a changing point for us。 That you would give in to your desire and admit your feelings for me。〃
A burning wash of color crept up my face。 I had no good excuse for the foreplay that got out of hand。 I was weak； so sue me。 〃I gave you blood because you were dying。 I'd have never done it otherwise。 You know that。〃
He stared at me。 It wasn't vampire tricks that made me want to look away。 It was a raw honesty that I'd never seen in his face before。 〃I know that now； ma petite。 When we returned from Branson； you threw yourself into Richard's arms as though he were a lifeline。 We continued to date； but you drew away。 I felt it and did not know how to stop it。〃
He sat up on the bed； hands clasped in his lap。 A look of frustration and confusion passed over his face。 〃I have never had another woman deny me； ma petite。〃
I laughed。 〃Oh； your ego isn't big。〃
〃It is not ego； ma petite； it is the truth。〃
I leaned against t