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re bright with anger。
I swear that my heart thudded to a halt in my chest。 The cold of death swept through me。 〃It is true； I have no right；〃 I said haltingly。 〃But neither is there any way I could stop caring for you。 And whether or not I have the right to name you my beloved would not deter those who might seek to injure me by striking at you。 How can I say I love you so much that I wish I did not love you； or at least could refrain from showing that I loved you； because my love puts you in such danger； and have those words be true？〃 Stiffly； I turned to go。
〃And how could I possibly dare to say I made sense of your last statement and have it be true？〃 Molly wondered aloud。
Something in her voice made me turn around。 For a moment we just looked at one another。 Then she burst out laughing。 I stood； affronted and grim； as she came to me； still laughing。 Then she put her arms around me。 〃Newboy。 You take a most roundabout path to finally declare you love me。 To break into my room； and then to stand there； tying your tongue in knots about the word ‘love。' Could not you simply have said it； a long time ago？〃
I stood stupid in the circle of her arms。 I looked down at her。 Yes； I realized dully； I had grown that much taller than she。
〃Well？〃 she prompted； and for a moment I was puzzled。
〃I love you； Molly。〃 So easy to say； after all。 And such a relief。 Slowly； cautiously； I put my arms around her。
She smiled up at me。 〃And I love you。〃
So； finally； I kissed her。 In the moment of that kiss； somewhere near Buckkeep； a wolf lifted up his voice in a joyous ululation that set every hound to baying and every dog to barking in a chorus that rang against the brittle night sky。
CHAPTER NINE
Guards and Bonds
OFTENTIMES I UNDERSTAND and mend Fedwren's stated dream。 Had he his way； paper would be as mon as bread； and every child would learn his letters before he was thirteen。 But even were it so； I do not think this would bring to pass all he hopes。 He mourns of all the knowledge that goes into a grave each time a man dies； even the monest of men。 He speaks of a time to e when a blacksmith's way of setting a shoe； or a shipwright's knack for pulling a drawknife would be set down in letters； that any who could read could learn to do as well。 I do not believe it is so； or ever will be。 Some things may be learned from words on a page； but some skills are learned first by a man's hands and heart； and later by his head。 I have believed this ever since I saw Mastfish set the fish…shaped block of wood that he was named after into Verity's first ship。 His eyes had seen that mastfish before it existed； and he set his hands to shaping what his heart knew must be。 This is not a thing that can be learned from words on a page。 Perhaps it cannot be learned at all； but es； as does the Skill or the Wit； from the blood of one's forebears。
I returned to my own chamber and sat watching the dying embers in my hearth； waiting for the rest of the Keep to awaken。 I should have been exhausted。 Instead； I almost trembled with the energy rushing through me。 I fancied that if I sat very still； I could still feel the warmth of Molly's arms around me。 I knew precisely where her cheek had touched mine。 A very faint scent of her clung to my shirt from our brief embrace； and I agonized over whether to wear the shirt that day； to carry that scent with me； or to set it aside carefully in my clothing chest； to preserve it。 I did not think it a foolish thing at all to care so much about that。 Looking back； I smile； but it is at my wisdom； not my folly。
Morning brought storm winds and falling snow to Buckkeep Castle； but to me it only made all inside the cozier。 Perhaps it would give us all a chance to recover ourselves from yesterday。 I did not want to think about those poor ragged bodies； or bathing the still； cold faces。 Nor of the roaring flames and heat that had consumed Kerry's body。 We could all use a quiet day inside the Keep。 Perhaps the evening would find all gathered about the hearths； for storytelling； music； and conversation。 I hoped so。 I left my chambers to go to Patience and Lacey。
I tormented myself； knowing well the exact moment when Molly would descend the stairs to fetch a breakfast tray for Patience； and also when she would ascend the stairs carrying it。 I could be on the stairs or in the hallway as she passed。 It would be a minor thing； a coincidence。 But I had no question that there were those who had been set to watching me； and they would make note of such 〃coincidences〃 if they occurred too often。 No。 I had to heed the warnings that both the King and Chade had given me。 I would show Molly I had a man's self…control and forbearance。 If I must wait before I could court her； then I would。
So I sat in my room and agonized until I was sure that she would have left Patience's chambers。 Then I descended； to tap upon the door。 As I waited for Lacey to open it I reflected that redoubling my watch upon Patience and Lacey was easier said than done。 But I had a few ideas。 I had begun last night； by extracting a promise from Molly that she would bring up no food she had not prepared herself； or taken fresh from the mon serving pots。 She had snorted at this； for it had e after a most ardent good…bye。 〃Now you sound just like Lacey；〃 she had rebuked me； and gently closed the door in my face。 She opened it a moment later； to find me still staring at it。 〃Go to bed；〃 she chided me。 Blushing； she added； 〃And dream of me。 I hope I have plagued your dreams lately as much as you have mine。〃 Those words sent me fleeing down to my room； and every time I thought of it； I blushed again。
Now； as I entered Patience's room； I tried to put all such thoughts from my mind。 I was here on business； even if Patience and Lacey must believe it a social call。 Keep my mind on my tasks。 I cast my eyes over the latch that had secured the door and found it well to my liking。 No one would be slipping that with a belt knife。 As for the window； even if anyone had scaled the outer wall to it； they must burst through not only stoutly barred wooden shutters； but a tapestry； and then rank upon rank of pots of plants； soldiered in rows before the closed window。 It was a route no professional would willingly choose。 Lacey resettled herself with a bit of mending while Patience greeted me。 Lady Patience herself was seemingly idle； seated on the hearth before the fire as if she were but a girl。 She poked at the coals a bit。 〃Did you know；〃 she asked me suddenly； 〃that there is a substantial history of strong Queens at Buckkeep？ Not just those born as Farseers； either。 Many a Farseer Prince has married a woman whose name came to overshadow his in the telling of deeds。〃
〃Do you think Kettricken will bee such a Queen？〃 I asked politely。 I had no idea where this conversation would lead。
〃I do not know；〃 she said softly。 She stirred the coals idly again。 〃I only know that I would not have been one。〃 She sighed heavily； then lifted her eyes to say almost apologetically； 〃I am having one of those mornings； Fitz； when all that fills my head is what m