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〃 he asks。 I shake my head。 How could he die as anyone but himself？ ¨I donˇt want them to change me in there。 Turn me into some kind of monster that Iˇm not。〃
I bite my lip feeling inferior。 While Iˇve been ruminating on the availability of trees； Peeta has been struggling with how to maintain his identity。 His purity of self。 ¨Do you mean you wonˇt kill anyone？〃 I ask。
¨No； when the time es； Iˇm sure Iˇll kill just like everybody else。 I canˇt go down without a fight。 Only I keep wishing I could think of a way to 。 。 。 to show the Capitol they donˇt own me。 That Iˇm more than just a piece in their Games；〃 says Peeta。
¨But youˇre not；〃 I say。 ¨None of us are。 Thatˇs how the Games work。〃
¨Okay； but within that framework； thereˇs still you； thereˇs still me；〃 he insists。 ¨Donˇt you see？〃
¨A little。 Only 。 。 。 no offense； but who cares； Peeta？〃 I say。
¨I do。 I mean； what else am I allowed to care about at this point？〃 he asks angrily。 Heˇs locked those blue eyes on mine now； demanding an answer。
I take a step back。 ¨Care about what Haymitch said。 About staying alive。〃
Peeta smiles at me； sad and mocking。 ¨Okay。 Thanks for the tip； sweetheart。〃
Itˇs like a slap in the face。 His use of Haymitchˇs patronizing endearment。 ¨Look； if you want to spend the last hours of your life planning some noble death in the arena； thatˇs your choice。 I want to spend mine in District Twelve。〃
¨Wouldnˇt surprise me if you do；〃 says Peeta。 ¨Give my mother my best when you make it back； will you？〃
¨Count on it；〃 I say。 Then I turn and leave the roof。 I spend the rest of the night slipping in and out of a doze； imagining the cutting remarks I will make to Peeta Mellark in the morning。 Peeta Mellark。 We will see how high and mighty he is when he's faced with life and death。 He'll probably turn into one of those raging beast tributes； the kind who tries to eat someone's heart after they've killed them。 There was a guy like that a few years ago from District 6 called Titus。 He went pletely savage and the Gamemakers had to have him stunned with electric guns to collect the bodies of the players he'd killed before he ate them。 There are no rules in the arena； but cannibalism doesn't play well with the Capitol audience； so they tried to head it off。 There was some speculation that the avalanche that finally took Titus out was specifically engineered to ensure the victor was not a lunatic。
I don't see Peeta in the morning。 Cinna es to me before dawn； gives me a simple shift to wear； and guides me to the roof。 My final dressing and preparations will be alone in the catabs under the arena itself。 A hovercraft appears out of thin air； just like the one did in the woods the day I saw the redheaded Avox girl captured； and a ladder drops down。 I place my hands and feet on the lower rungs and instantly it's as if I'm frozen。 Some sort of current glues me to the ladder while I'm lifted safely inside。
I expect the ladder to release me then； but I'm still stuck when a woman in a white coat approaches me carrying a syringe。 〃This is just your tracker； Katniss。 The stiller you are； the more efficiently I can place it；〃 she says。
Still？ I'm a statue。 But that doesn't prevent me from feeling the sharp stab of pain as the needle inserts the metal tracking device deep under the skin on the inside of my forearm。 Now the Gamemakers will always be able to trace my whereabouts in the arena。 Wouldnˇt want to lose a tribute。
As soon as the trackerˇs in place； the ladder releases me。 The woman disappears and Cinna is retrieved from the roof； An Avox boy es in and directs us to a room where breakfast has been laid out。 Despite the tension in my stomach； I eat as much as I can； although none of the delectable food makes any impression on me。 Iˇm so nervous； I could be eating coal dust。 The one thing that distracts me at all is the view from the windows as we sail over the city and then to the wilderness beyond。 This is what birds see。 Only theyˇre free and safe。 The very opposite of me。
The ride lasts about half an hour before the windows black out； suggesting that weˇre nearing the arena。 The hovercraft lands and Cinna and I go back to the ladder； only this time it leads down into a tube underground； into the catabs that lie beneath the arena。 We follow instructions to my destination； a chamber for my preparation。 In the Capitol； they call it the Launch Room。 In the districts； itˇs referred to as the Stockyard。 The place animals go before slaughter。
Everything is brand…new； I will be the first and only tribute to use this Launch Room。 The arenas are historic sites； preserved after the Games。 Popular destinations for Capitol residents to visit； to vacation。 Go for a month； rewatch the Games； tour the catabs； visit the sites where the deaths took place。 You can even take part in reenactments。 They say the food is excellent。
I struggle to keep my breakfast down as I shower and clean my teeth。 Cinna does my hair in my simple trademark braid down my back。 Then the clothes arrive； the same for every tribute。 Cinna has had no say in my outfit； does not even know what will be in the package； but he helps me dress in the undergarments； simple tawny pants； light green blouse； sturdy brown belt； and thin； hooded black jacket that falls to my thighs。 ¨The material in the jacketˇs designed to reflect body heat。 Expect some cool nights；〃 he says。
The boots； worn over skintight socks； are better than I could have hoped for。 Soft leather not unlike my ones at home。 These have a narrow flexible rubber sole with treads though。 Good for running。
I think Iˇm finished when Cinna pulls the gold mockingjay pin from his pocket。 I had pletely forgotten about it。
¨Where did you get that？〃 I ask。
¨Off the green outfit you wore on the train；〃 he says。 I remember now taking it off my motherˇs dress； pinning it to the shirt。 ¨Itˇs your district token； right？〃 I nod and he fastens it on my shirt。 ¨It barely cleared the review board。 Some thought the pin could be used as a weapon； giving you an unfair advantage。 But eventually； they let it through；〃 says Cinna。 ¨They eliminated a ring from that District One girl； though。 If you twisted the gemstone； a spike popped out。 Poisoned one。 She claimed she had no knowledge the ring transformed and there was no way to prove she did。 But she lost her token。 There； youˇre all set。 Move around。 Make sure everything feels fortable。〃
I walk； run in a circle； swing my arms about。 ¨Yes； itˇs fine。 Fits perfectly。〃
¨Then thereˇs nothing to do but wait for the call；〃 says Cinna。 ¨Unless you think you could eat any more？〃
I turn down food but accept a glass of water that I take tiny sips of as we wait on a couch。 I donˇt want to chew on my nails or lips； so I find myself gnawing on the inside of my cheek。 It still hasnˇt fully healed from a few days ago。 Soon the taste of blood fills my mouth。
Nervousness seeps into terror as I anticipate what is to e。 I could be dead； flat…out dead； in an hour。 Not even。 My fingers obsessively trace the hard little lump on my forearm where the woman injected the tracking device。 I press on it； even though it hurts； I press on it so hard a small b