按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
My old woman proved a fast friend； and as she sent me numerous patients； I by and by altered my sign to ‘‘Homeopathic Physician and Surgeon；'' whatever that may mean； and was regarded by my medical brothers as a lost sheep； and by the little…pill doctors as one who had seen the error of his ways。
In point of fact； my new practice had decided advantages。 All pills looked and tasted alike； and the same might be said of the powders； so that I was never troubled by those absurd investigations into the nature of remedies which some patients are prone to make。 Of course I desired to get business； and it was therefore obviously unwise to give little pills of ‘‘Lac。；'' or ‘‘Puls。；'' or ‘‘Sep。；'' when a man needed a dose of oil； or a white… faced girl iron； or the like。 I soon made the useful discovery that it was only necessary to prescribe cod…liver oil； for instance； as a diet； in order to make use of it where required。 When a man got impatient over an ancient ague； I usually found； too； that I could persuade him to let me try a good dose of quinine； while； on the other hand； there was a distinct pecuniary advantage in those cases of the shakes which could be made to believe that it ‘‘was best not to interfere with nature。'' I ought to add that this kind of faith is uncommon among folks who carry hods or build walls。
For women who are hysterical； and go heart and soul into the business of being sick； I have found the little pills a most charming resort； because you cannot carry the refinement of symptoms beyond what my friend Jahr has done in the way of fitting medicines to them； so that if I had taken seriously to practising this double form of therapeutics； it had； as I saw； certain conveniences。
Another year went by； and I was beginning to prosper in my new mode of life。 My medicines （being chiefly milk…sugar； with variations as to the labels） cost next to nothing； and as I charged pretty well for both these and my advice； I was now able to start a gig。
I solemnly believe that I should have continued to succeed in the practice of my profession if it had not happened that fate was once more unkind to me； by throwing in my path one of my old acquaintances。 I had a consultation one day with the famous homeopath Dr。 Zwanzig。 As we walked away we were busily discussing the case of a poor consumptive fellow who previously had lost a leg。 In consequence of this defect； Dr。 Zwanzig considered that the ten…thousandth of a grain of aurum would be an overdose； and that it must be fractioned so as to allow for the departed leg； otherwise the rest of the man would be getting a leg…dose too much。 I was particularly struck with this view of the case； but I was still more； and less pleasingly； impressed at the sight of my former patient Stagers； who nodded to me familiarly from the opposite pavement。
I was not at all surprised when； that evening quite late； I found this worthy waiting in my office。 I looked around uneasily； which was clearly understood by my friend； who retorted： ‘‘Ain't took nothin' of yours； doc。 You don't seem right awful glad to see me。 You needn't be afraidI've only fetched you a job； and a right good one； too。''
I replied that I had my regular business； that I preferred he should get some one else； and pretty generally made Mr。 Stagers aware that I had had enough of him。 I did not ask him to sit down； and； just as I supposed him about to leave； he seated himself with a grin； remarking； ‘‘No use； doc； got to go into it this one time。''
At this I； naturally enough； grew angry and used several rather violent phrases。
‘‘No use； doc；'' said Stagers。
Then I softened down； and laughed a little； and treated the thing as a joke； whatever it was； for I dreaded to hear。
But Stagers was fate。 Stagers was inevitable。 ‘‘Won't do； docnot even money wouldn't get you off。''
‘‘No？'' said I； interrogatively； and as coolly as I could； contriving at the same time to move toward the window。 It was summer； the sashes were up； the shutters half drawn in； and a policeman whom I knew was lounging opposite； as I had noticed when I entered。 I would give Stagers a scare； charge him with theftanything but get mixed up with his kind again。 It was the folly of a moment and I should have paid dear for it。
He must have understood me； the scoundrel； for in an instant I felt a cold ring of steel against my ear； and a tiger clutch on my cravat。 ‘‘Sit down；'' he said。 ‘‘What a fool you are！ Guess you forgot that there coroner's business and the rest。'' Needless to say that I obeyed。 ‘‘Best not try that again；'' continued my guest。 ‘‘Wait a moment''； and rising； he closed the window。
There was no resource left but to listen； and what followed I shall condense rather than relate it in the language employed by Mr。 Stagers。
It appeared that my other acquaintance Mr。 File had been guilty of a cold…blooded and long…premeditated murder； for which he had been tried and convicted。 He now lay in jail awaiting his execution； which was to take place at Carsonville； Ohio。 It seemed that with Stagers and others he had formed a band of expert counterfeiters in the West。 Their business lay in the manufacture of South American currencies。 File had thus acquired a fortune so considerable that I was amazed at his having allowed his passion to seduce him into unprofitable crime。 In his agony he unfortunately thought of me； and had bribed Stagers largely in order that he might be induced to find me。 When the narration had reached this stage； and I had been made fully to understand that I was now and hereafter under the sharp eye of Stagers and his friends； that； in a word； escape was out of the question； I turned on my tormentor。
‘‘What does all this mean？'' I said。 ‘‘What does File expect me to do？''
‘‘Don't believe he exactly knows；'' said Stagers。 ‘‘Something or other to get him clear of hemp。''
‘‘But what stuff！'' I replied。 ‘‘How can I help him？ What possible influence could I exert？''
‘‘Can't say；'' answered Stagers； imperturbably。 ‘‘File has a notion you're 'most cunning enough for anything。 Best try something； doc。''
‘‘And what if I won't do it？'' said I。 ‘‘What does it matter to me if the rascal swings or no？''
‘‘Keep cool； doc；'' returned Stagers。 ‘‘I'm only agent in this here business。 My principal； that's File； he says： ‘Tell Sanderaft to find some way to get me clear。 Once out； I give him ten thousand dollars。 If he don't turn up something that will suit； I'll blow about that coroner business and Lou Wilson； and break him up generally。' ''
‘‘You don't mean；'' said I； in a cold sweat ‘‘you don't mean that； if I can't do this impossible thing； he will inform on me？''
‘‘Just so；'' returned Stagers。 ‘‘Got a cigar； doc？''
I only half heard him。 What a frightful position！ I had been leading a happy and an increasingly profitable lifeno scrapes and no dangers； and here； on a sudden； I had presented to me the alternative of saving a wretch from the gallows or of spending unlimited years in a State penitentiary。 As for the money； it became as dead leaves for this once only in my life。 My brain seemed to be spinning round。 I grew weak all over。
‘‘Cheer up a little；'' said Stagers。 ‘‘Take a nip of whisky。