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business； and I shall not be back until eleven o'clock； but I shall be
back at eleven precisely； and I reckon on you to keep Bertha company。'
〃The young woman smiled。
〃'It was my idea；' she said； 'to send for you。'
〃I held out my hand to her。
〃'You are as nice as ever； I said； and I felt a long； friendly pressure
of my fingers； but I paid no attention to it； so we sat down to dinner；
and at eight o'clock Julien went out。
〃As soon as he had gone； a kind of strange embarrassment immediately
seemed to arise between his wife and me。 We had never been alone
together yet； and in spite of our daily increasing intimacy； this tete
…a…tete placed us in a new position。 At first I spoke vaguely of those
indifferent matters with which one fills up an embarrassing silence； but
she did not reply； and remained opposite to me with her head down in an
undecided manner； as if she were thinking over some difficult subject；
and as I was at a loss for small talk； I held my tongue。 It is
surprising how hard it is at times to find anything to say。
〃And then also I felt something in the air； something I could not
express； one of those mysterious premonitions that warn one of another
person's secret intentions in regard to yourself； whether they be good or
evil。
〃That painful silence lasted some time； and then Bertha said to me：
〃'Will you kindly put a log on the fire for it is going out。'
〃So I opened the box where the wood was kept； which was placed just where
yours is； took out the largest log and put it on top of the others； which
were three parts burned； and then silence again reigned in the room。
〃In a few minutes the log was burning so brightly that it scorched our
faces； and the young woman raised her eyes to mineeyes that had a
strange look to me。
〃'It is too hot now；' she said； 'let us go and sit on the sofa over
there。'
〃So we went and sat on the sofa； and then she said suddenly； looking me
full in the face：
〃'What would you do if a woman were to tell you that she was in love with
you？'
〃'Upon my word；' I replied； very much at a loss for an answer； 'I cannot
foresee such a case； but it would depend very much upon the woman。'
〃She gave a hard； nervous； vibrating laugh； one of those false laughs
which seem as if they must break thin glass； and then she added： 'Men are
never either venturesome or spiteful。' And； after a moment's silence；
she continued： 'Have you ever been in love； Monsieur Paul？' I was
obliged to acknowledge that I certainly had； and she asked me to tell her
all about it。 Whereupon I made up some story or other。 She listened to
me attentively； with frequent signs of disapproval and contempt； and then
suddenly she said：
〃'No； you understand nothing about the subject。 It seems to me that real
love must unsettle the mind； upset the nerves and distract the head； that
it musthow shall I express it？be dangerous； even terrible； almost
criminal and sacrilegious； that it must be a kind of treason； I mean to
say that it is bound to break laws； fraternal bonds； sacred obligations；
when love is tranquil； easy； lawful and without dangers； is it really
love？'
〃I did not know what answer to give her； and I made this philosophical
reflection to myself： 'Oh！ female brain； here； indeed； you show
yourself！'
〃While speaking； she had assumed a demure saintly air； and； resting on
the cushions； she stretched herself out at full length； with her head on
my shoulder； and her dress pulled up a little so as to show her red
stockings； which the firelight made look still brighter。 In a minute or
two she continued：
〃'I suppose I have frightened you？' I protested against such a notion；
and she leaned against my breast altogether； and without looking at me；
she said： 'If I were to tell you that I love you； what would you do？'
〃And before I could think of an answer； she had thrown her arms around my
neck； had quickly drawn my head down； and put her lips to mine。
〃Oh！ My dear friend； I can tell you that I did not feel at all happy！
What！ deceive Julien？ become the lover of this little； silly； wrong…
headed； deceitful woman； who was； no doubt； terribly sensual； and whom
her husband no longer satisfied。
To betray him continually； to deceive him； to play at being in love
merely because I was attracted by forbidden fruit； by the danger incurred
and the friendship betrayed！ No； that did not suit me； but what was I to
do？ To imitate Joseph would be acting a very stupid and； moreover；
difficult part； for this woman was enchanting in her perfidy； inflamed by
audacity； palpitating and excited。 Let the man who has never felt on his
lips the warm kiss of a woman who is ready to give herself to him throw
the first stone at me。
〃Well； a minute moreyou understand what I mean？ A minute more； andI
should have beenno； she would have been！I beg your pardon； he would
have beenwhen a loud noise made us both jump up。 The log had fallen
into the room； knocking over the fire irons and the fender； and on to the
carpet； which it had scorched； and had rolled under an armchair； which it
would certainly set alight。
〃I jumped up like a madman； and； as I was replacing on the fire that log
which had saved me； the door opened hastily； and Julien came in。
〃'I am free；' he said； with evident pleasure。 'The business was over two
hours sooner than I expected！'
〃Yes； my dear friend； without that log； I should have been caught in the
very act； and you know what the consequences would have been！
〃You may be sure that I took good care never to be found in a similar
situation again； never； never。 Soon afterward I saw that Julien was
giving me the 'cold shoulder；' as they say。 His wife was evidently
undermining our friendship。 By degrees he got rid of me； and we have
altogether ceased to meet。
〃I never married； which ought not to surprise you； I think。〃
JULIE ROMAIN
Two years ago this spring I was making a walking tour along the shore of
the Mediterranean。 Is there anything more pleasant than to meditate
while walking at a good pace along a highway？ One walks in the sunlight；
through the caressing breeze； at the foot of the mountains； along the
coast of the sea。 And one dreams！ What a flood of illusions； loves；
adventures pass through a pedestrian's mind during a two hours' march！
What a crowd of confused and joyous hopes enter into you with the mild；
light air！ You drink them in with the breeze； and they awaken in your
heart a longing for happiness which increases with the hun ger induced by
walking。 The fleeting； charming ideas fly and sing like birds。
I was following that long road which goes from Saint Raphael to Italy；
or； rather； that long； splendid panoramic highway which seems made for
the representation of all the love…poems of earth。 And I thought that
from Cannes； where one poses； to Monaco； where one gambles； people come
to this spot of the earth for hardly any other purpose than to get
embroiled or to throw away money on chance games； displaying under this
delicious sky and in this garden of roses and oranges all base vanities
and foolish pretensions and vile lusts； showing up the hu