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“Give it a rest； Bella；” I heard him mutter as he re…zipped the door。
I listened for the sound of his retreating footsteps； but it was perfectly still。 No more wind。 I could hear
morning birdsong far away on the mountain； and nothing else。 Jacob moved in silence now。
I huddled in my coats； and leaned against Edward’s shoulder。 We were quiet for a long time。
“How much longer？” I asked。
“Alice told Sam it should be an hour or so；” Edward said； soft and bleak。
“We stay together。 No matter what。”
“No matter what；” he agreed； his eyes tight。
“I know；” I said。 “I’m terrified for them； too。”
“They know how to handle themselves；” Edward assured me； purposely making his voice light。 “I just hate
missing the fun。”
Again with the fun。 My nostrils flared。
He put his arm around my shoulder。 “Don’t worry；” he urged； and then he kissed my forehead。
As if there was any way to avoid that。 “Sure； sure。”
“Do you want me to distract you？” He breathed； running his cold fingers along my cheekbone。
I shivered involuntarily； the morning was still frosty。
“Maybe not right now；” he answered himself； pulling his hand away。
“There are other ways to distract me。”
“What would you like？”
“You could tell me about your ten best nights；” I suggested。 “I’m curious。”
He laughed。 “Try to guess。”
I shook my head。 “There’re too many nights I don’t know about。 A century of them。”
“I’ll narrow it down for you。 All of my best nights have happened since I met you。”
“Really？”
“Yes； really — and by quite a wide margin； too。”
I thought for a minute。 “I can only think of mine；” I admitted。
“They might be the same；” he encouraged。
“Well； there was the first night。 The night you stayed。”
“Yes； that’s one of mine； too。 Of course； you were unconscious for my favorite part。”
“That’s right；” I remembered。 “I was talking that night； too。”
“Yes；” he agreed。
My face got hot as I wondered again what I might have said while sleeping in Jacob’s arms。 I couldn’t
remember what I’d dreamed about； or if I’d dreamed at all； so that was no help。
“What did I say last night？” I whispered more quietly than before。
He shrugged instead of answering； and I winced。
“That bad？”
“Nothing too horrible；” he sighed。
“Please tell me。”
“Mostly you said my name； the same as usual。”
“That’s not bad；” I agreed cautiously。
“Near the end； though； you started mumbling some nonsense about ‘Jacob； my Jacob。’” I could hear the
pain； even in the whisper。 “Your Jacob enjoyed that quite a lot。”
I stretched my neck up； straining to reach my lips to the edge of his jaw。 I couldn’t see into his eyes。 He
was staring up at the ceiling of the tent。
“Sorry；” I murmured。 “That’s just the way I differentiate。”
“Differentiate？”
“Between Dr。 Jekyll and Mr。 Hyde。 Between the Jacob I like and the one who annoys the hell out of me；”
I explained。
“That makes sense。” He sounded slightly mollified。 “Tell me another favorite night。”
“Flying home from Italy。”
He frowned。
“Is that not one of yours？” I wondered。
“No； it is one of mine； actually； but I’m surprised it’s on your list。 Weren’t you under the ludicrous
impression I was just acting from a guilty conscience； and I was going to bolt as soon as the plane doors
opened？”
“Yes。” I smiled。 “But； still； you were there。”
He kissed my hair。 “You love me more than I deserve。”
I laughed at the impossibility of that idea。 “Next would be the night after Italy；” I continued。
“Yes； that’s on the list。 You were so funny。”
“Funny？” I objected。
“I had no idea your dreams were so vivid。 It took me forever to convince you that you were awake。”
“I’m still not sure；” I muttered。 “You’ve always seemed more like a dream than reality。 Tell me one of
yours； now。 Did I guess your first place？”
“No — that would be two nights ago； when you finally agreed to marry me。”
I made a face。
“That doesn’t make your list？”
I thought about the way he’d kissed me； the concession I’d gained； and changed my mind。 “Yes 。 。 。 it
does。 But with reservations。 I don’t understand why it’s so important to you。 You already had me forever。”
“A hundred years from now； when you’ve gained enough perspective to really appreciate the answer； I
will explain it to you。”
“I’ll remind you to explain — in a hundred years。”
“Are you warm enough？” he asked suddenly。
“I’m fine；” I assured him。 “Why？”
Before he could answer； the silence outside the tent was ripped apart by an earsplitting howl of pain。 The
sound ricocheted off the bare rock face of the mountain and filled the air so that it seared from every direction。
The howl tore through my mind like a tornado； both strange and familiar。 Strange because I’d never heard
such a tortured cry before。 Familiar because I knew the voice at once — I recognized the sound and
understood the meaning as perfectly as if I’d uttered it myself。 It made no difference that Jacob was not human
when he cried out。 I needed no translation。
Jacob was close。 Jacob had heard every word we’d said。 Jacob was in agony。
The howl choked off into a peculiar gurgled sob； and then it was quiet again。
I did not hear his silent escape； but I could feel it — I could feel the absence I had wrongly assumed
before； the empty space he left behind。
“Because your space heater has reached his limit；” Edward answered quietly。 “Truce over；” he added； so
low I couldn’t be sure that was really what he’d said。
“Jacob was listening；” I whispered。 It wasn’t a question。
“Yes。”
“You knew。”
“Yes。”
I stared at nothing； seeing nothing。
“I never promised to fight fair；” he reminded me quietly。 “And he deserves to know。”
My head fell into my hands。
“Are you angry with me？” he asked。
“Not you；” I whispered。 “I’m horrified at me。”
“Don’t torment yourself；” he pleaded。
“Yes；” I agreed bitterly。 “I should save my energy to torment Jacob some more。 I wouldn’t want to leave
any part of him unharmed。”
“He knew what he was doing。”
“Do you think that matters？” I was blinking back tears； and this was easy to hear in my voice。 “Do you
think I care whether it’s fair or whether he was adequately warned？ I’m hurting him。 Every time I turn
around； I’m hurting him again。” My voice was getting louder； more hysterical。 “I’m a hideous person。”
He wrapped his arms tightly around me。 “No； you’re not。”
“I am！ What’s wrong with me？” I struggled against his arms； and he let them drop。 “I have to go find him。”
“Bella； he’s already miles away； and it’s cold。”
“I don’t care。 I can’t just sit here。” I shrugged off Jacob’s parka； shoved my feet into my boots； and
crawled stiffly to the door； my legs felt nu