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〃Now I _will_ ease my heart;〃 said Julia; impetuously; addressing some invisible obstacle。 〃I tell you I am sick of having secrets from my own mother。〃 And with this out it all came。 She told the story of her heart better than I have; and; woman…like; dwelt on the depths of loyalty and delicate love she had read in Alfred's moonlit face that night at Henley。 She said no eloquence could have touched her like it。 〃Mamma; something said to me; 'Ay; look at him well; for that is your husband to be。'〃 She even tried to solve the mystery of her _soi…disant_ sickness: 〃I was disturbed by a feeling so new and so powerful;* but; above all; by having a secret from you; the firstthe last。〃
*Perhaps even this faint attempt at self…analysis was due to the influence of Dr。 Whately。 For; by nature; young ladies of this age seldom turn the eye inward。
〃Well; darling; then why have a secret? Why not trust me; your friend as well as your mother?〃
〃Ah! why; indeed? I am a puzzle to myself。 I wanted you to know; and yet I could not tell you。 I kept giving you hints; and hoped so you would take them; and make me speak out。 But when I tried to tell you plump; something kept pullpullpulling me inside; and I couldn't。 Mark my words! some day it will turn out that I am neither more nor less than a fool。〃
Mrs。 Dodd slighted this ingenious solution。 She said; after a moment's reflection; that the fault of this misunderstanding lay between the two。 〃I remember now I have had many hints; my mind must surely have gone to sleep。 I was a poor simple woman who thought her daughter was to be always a child。 And you were very wrong to go and set a limit to your mother's love: there is nonenone whatever。〃 She added: 〃I must import a little prudence and respect for the world's opinion into this new connection; but whoever you love shall find no enemy in me。〃
Next day Alfred came to know his fate。 He was received with ceremonious courtesy。 At first he was a good deal embarrassed; but this was no sooner seen than it was relieved by Mrs。 Dodd with tact and gentleness。 When her turn came; she said; 〃Your papa? Of course you have communicated this step to him?〃
Alfred looked a little confused; and said; 〃No: he left for London two days ago; as it happens。〃
〃That is unfortunate;〃 said Mrs。 Dodd。 〃Your best plan would be to write to him at once。 I need hardly tell you that we shall enter no family without an invitation from its head。〃
Alfred replied that he was well aware of that; and that he knew his father; and could answer for him。 〃No doubt;〃 said Mrs。 Dodd; 〃but; as a matter of reasonable form; I prefer he should answer for himself。〃 Alfred would write by this post。 〃It is a mere form;〃 said he; 〃for my father has but one answer to his children; 'Please yourselves。' He sometimes adds; 'and how much money shall you want?' These are his two formulae。〃
He then delivered a glowing eulogy on his father; and Mrs。 Dodd; to whom the boy's character was now a grave and anxious study; saw with no common satisfaction his cheek flush and his eyes moisten as he dwelt on the calm; sober; unvarying affection; and reasonable indulgence he and his sister had met with all their lives from the best of parents。 Returning to the topic of topics; he proposed an engagement。 〃I have a ring in my pocket;〃 said this brisk wooer; looking down。 But this Mrs。 Dodd thought premature and unnecessary。 〃You are nearly of age;〃 said she; 〃and then you will be able to marry; if you are in the same mind。〃 But; upon being warmly pressed; she half conceded even this。 〃Well;〃 said she; 〃on receiving your father's consent; you can _propose_ an engagement to Julia; and she shall use her own judgment; but; until then; you will not even mention such a thing to her。 May I count on so much forbearance from you; sir?〃
〃Dear Mrs。 Dodd;〃 said Alfred; 〃of course you may。 I should indeed be ungrateful if I could not wait a post for that。 May I write to my father here?〃 added he; naively。
Mrs。 Dodd smiled; furnished him with writing materials; and left him; with a polite excuse。
〃ALBION VILLA; _September 29。_
〃MY DEAR FATHER;You are too thorough a man of the world; and too well versed in human nature; to be surprised at hearing that I; so long invulnerable; have at last formed a devoted attachment to one whose beauty; goodness; and accomplishments I will not now enlarge upon; they are indescribable; and you will very soon see them and judge for yourself。 The attachment; though short in weeks and months; has been a very long one in hopes; and fears; and devotion。 I should have told you of it before you left; but in truth I had no idea I was so near the goal of all my earthly hopes; there were many difficulties: but these have just cleared away almost miraculously; and nothing now is wanting to my happiness but your consent。 It would be affectation; or worse; in me to doubt that you will grant it。 But; in a matter so delicate; I venture to ask you for something more: the mother of my ever and only beloved Julia is a lady of high breeding and sentiments: she will not let her daughter enter any family without a cordial invitation from its head。 Indeed she has just told me so。 I ask; therefore; not your bare consent; of which I am sure; since my happiness for life depends on it; but a consent so gracefully wordedand who can do this better than you?as to gratify the just pride and sensibilities of the high…minded family about to confide its brightest ornament to my care。
〃My dear father; in the midst of felicity almost more than mortal; the thought has come that this letter is my first step towards leaving the paternal roof under which I have been so happy all my life; thanks to you。 I should indeed be unworthy of all your goodness if this thought caused me no emotion。
〃Yet I do but yield to Nature's universal law。 And; should I be master of my own destiny; I will not go far from you。 I have been unjust to Barkington: or rather I have echoed; without thought; Oxonian prejudices and affectation。 On mature reflection; I know no better residence for a married man。
〃Do you remember about a year ago you mentioned a Miss Lucy Fountain to us as 'the most perfect gentlewoman you had ever met?' Well; strange to say; it is that very lady's daughter; and I think when you see her you will say the breed has anything but declined; in spite of Horace mind his _'damnosa quid non。'_ Her brother is my dearest friend; and she is Jenny's; so a more happy alliance for all parties was never projected。
〃Write to me by return; dear father; and believe me; ever your dutiful and grateful son;
〃ALFRED HARDlE。〃
As he concluded; Julia came in; and he insisted on her reading this masterpiece。 She hesitated。 Then he told her with juvenile severity that a good husband always shares his letters with his wife。
〃His wife! Alfred!〃 and she coloured all over。 〃Don't call me _names;_〃 said she; turning it off after her fashion。 〃I can't bear it: it makes me tremble。 With fury。〃
〃This will never do; sweet one;〃 said Alfred gravely。 〃You and I are to have no separate existence now; you are to be I; and I am to be you。 Come!〃
〃No; you read me so much of it as is proper for me to hear。 I shall n