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CHAPTER XLVIII。
No life was ever yet a play: I mean; an unbroken sequence of dramatic incidents。 Calms will come; unfortunately for the readers; happily for the read。 And I remember seeing it objected to novelists; by a young gentleman just putting his foot for the first time into 〃Criticism;〃 that the writers aforesaid suppress the small intermediate matters which in real life come by the score between each brilliant event: and so present the ordinary and the extraordinary parts of life in false proportions。 Now; if this remark had been offered by way of contrast between events themselves and all mortal attempts to reproduce them upon paper or the stage; it would have been philosophical; but it was a strange error to denounce the practice as distinctive of fiction: for it happens to be the one trait the novelist and dramatist have in common with the evangelist。 The Gospels skip fifteen years of the most interesting life Creation has witnessed; they relate Christ's birth in full; but hurry from His boyhood to the more stirring events of His thirtieth and subsequent years。 And all the inspired histories do much the same thing。 The truth is; that epics; dramas; novels; histories; chronicles; reports of trials at law; in a word; all narratives true or fictitious; except those which; true or fictitious; nobody reads; abridge the uninteresting facts as Nature never did; and dwell as Nature never did on the interesting ones。
Can nothing; however; be done to restore; in the reader's judgment; that just balance of 〃the sensational〃 and the 〃soporific;〃 which all writers; that have readers; disturb? Nothing; I think; without his own assistance。 But surely something with it。 And; therefore; I throw myself on the intelligence of my readers; and ask them to realise; that henceforth pages are no strict measure of time; and that to a year big with strange events; on which I have therefore dilated in this story; succeeded a year in which few brilliant things happened to the personages of this tale: in short; a year to be skimmed by chronicler or novelist; and yet (mind you) a year of three hundred and sixty…five days six hours; or thereabouts; and one in which the quiet; unobtrusive troubles of our friends' hearts; especially the female hearts; their doubts; divisions; distresses; did not remitfar from it。 Now this year I propose to divide into topics; and go by logical; rather than natural; sequence of events。
THE LOVERS。
Alfred came every day to see Julia; and Mrs。 Dodd invariably left the room at his knock。
At last Julia proposed to Alfred not to come to the house for the present; but to accompany her on her rounds as district visitor。 To see and soothe the bitter calamities of the poor had done her own heart good in its worst distress; and she desired to apply the same medicine to her beloved; who needed it: that was one thing: and then another was; that she found her own anger rising when her mother left the room at that beloved knock: and to be angry with her poor widowed; mother was a sin。 〃She is as unfortunate as I am happy;〃 thought Julia; 〃I have got _mine_ back。〃
Alfred assented to this arrangement with rather an ill grace。 He misunderstood Julia; and thought she was sacrificing him to what he called her mother's injustice。 This indeed was the interpretation any male would have been pretty sure to put on it。 His soreness; however; did not go very far; because she was so kind and good to him when they were together。 He used to escort her back to the door of 66: and look imploringly; but she never asked him in。 He thought her hard for this。 He did not see the tears that flowed for that mute look of his the moment the door was closed; tears she innocently restrained for fear the sight of them should make him as unhappy as his imploring look made her。 _Mauvais calcul!_ She should have cried right out。 When we men are unhappy; we like our sweethearts to be unhappierthat consoles _us。_
But when this had gone on nearly a month; and no change; Alfred lost patience: so he lingered one day at the door to make a request。 He asked Julia to marry him: and so put an end to this state of things。
〃Marry you; child?〃 cried Julia; blushing like a rose with surprise and pleasure。 〃Oh; for shame!〃
After the first thrill; she appealed to his candour whether that would not be miserably selfish of her to leave her poor mother in her present distressed condition。 〃Ah; Alfred; _so_ pale; _so_ spiritless; and inconsolable! My poor; poor mother!〃
〃You will have to decide between us two one day。〃
〃Heaven forbid!〃 said Julia; turning pale at the very idea。 But he repeated doggedly that it must come to that; sooner or later。 Then he reminded her of their solemn engagement; and put it to her whether it was a moral proceeding in her to go back from her plighted troth? What had he done to justify her in drawing back from her word? 〃I admit;〃 said he; 〃that I have _suffered_ plenty of wrong for your sake: but what have I done wrong?〃
Undeterred by the fear of immorality; the monotonous girl had but one reply to his multiform reasons: 〃This is no time for me to abandon my mother。〃
〃Ah; it is her you love: you don't care for me;〃 snapped Alfred。
〃Don't I; dear Alfred?〃 murmured Julia。
〃Forgive me! I'm a ruffian; a wretch。〃
〃You are my Alfred。 But oh; have a little patience; dear。〃
〃A little patience? I have the patience of Job。 But even his went at last。〃
'I ought to have said they were in the passage now。 The encroaching youth had gained an entrance by agitating her so at the door that she had to ask him in to hide her own blushes from the public。' She now gently reminded him how much happier they were than they had been for months。 〃Dear me;〃 said she; 〃I am almost happy: happier than I ought to be; could be quite so; but that I see you discontented。〃
〃Ah; you have so many about you that you love: I have only you。〃
〃And that is true; my poor Alfred。〃
This softened him a little; and then she interwove her fingers together; and so put both palms softly on his shoulder (you never saw a male do that; and never will); and implored him to be patient; to be generous。 〃Oh;〃 said she; 〃 if you knew the distress it gives me to refuse to you anything on earth; you would be generous; and not press me when my heart says 'Yes;' but my lips _must_ say 'No。'〃
This melted him altogether; and he said he would not torment her any more。
But he went away discontented with himself for having yielded: my lord did not call it 〃yielding;〃 but 〃being defeated。〃 And as he was not only very deep in love; but by nature combative; he took a lodging nearly opposite No。 66; and made hot love to her; as hot as if the attachment was just forming。 Her mother could not go out but he was at the door directly: she could not go out but he was at her heels。 This pleased her at first and thrilled her with the sense of sweet and hot pursuit: but by…and…by; situated as she was between him and her mother; it worried her a little at times; and made her nervous。 She spoke a little sharply to him now and then。 And that was new。 It came from the nerves; not the heart。 At last she advised him to go back to Oxford。 〃I shall be the ruin o