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Sir William Fondlove and his charming daughter。
Wild。 Ay； neighbour Constance。 Charming； does he say？
Yes； neighbour Constance is a charming girl
To those that do not know her。 If she plies me
As hard as was her custom in the country；
I should not wonder though； this very day；
I seek the home I quitted for a month！ ＇Aside。＇
Good even； gentlemen。
Hum。 Nay； if you go；
We all break up； and sally forth together。
Wal。 Be it soYour hand again； good Master Trueworth！
I am sorry I did pain you。
True。 It is thine； sir。
＇They go out。＇
SCENE III。Sir William Fondlove's House。A Room。
＇Enter SIR WILLIAM FONDLOVE。＇
Sir Wil。 At sixty…two； to be in leading…strings；
Is an old childand with a daughter； too！
Her mother held me ne'er in check so strait
As she。 I must not go but where she likes；
Nor see but whom she likes； do anything
But what she likes！A slut bare twenty…one！
Nor minces she commands！ A brigadier
More coolly doth not give his orders out
Than she！ Her waiting…maid is aide…de…camp；
My steward adjutant； my lacqueys serjeants；
That bring me her high pleasure how I march
And counter…marchwhen I'm on dutywhen
I'm offwhen suits it not to tell it me
Herself〃Sir William； thus my mistress says！〃
As saying it were enoughno will of mine
Consulted！ I will marry。 Must I serve；
Better a wife； my mistress； than a daughter！
And yet the vixen says； if I do marry；
I'll find she'll rule my wife； as well as me！
＇Enter TRUEWORTH。＇
Ah； Master Trueworth！ Welcome； Master Trueworth！
True。 Thanks； sir； I am glad to see you look so well！
Sir Wil。 Ah； Master Trueworth； when one turns the hill；
'Tis rapid going down！ We climb by steps；
By strides we reach the bottom。 Look at me；
And guess my age。
True。 Turned fifty。
Sir Wil。 Ten years more！
How marvellously well I wear！ I think
You would not flatter me！But scan me close；
And pryingly； as one who seeks a thing
He means to findWhat signs of age dost see？
True。 None！
Sir Wil。 None about the corners of the eyes？
Lines that diverge like to the spider's joists；
Whereon he builds his airy fortalice？
They call them crow's feethas the ugly bird
Been perching there？Eh？Well？
True。 There's something like；
But not what one must see； unless he's blind
Like steeple on a hill！
Sir Wil。 ＇After a pause。＇ Your eyes are good！
I am certainly a wonder for my age；
I walk as well as ever！ Do I stoop？
True。 A plummet from your head would find your heel。
Sir Wil。 It is my makemy make； good Master Trueworth；
I do not study it。 Do you observe
The hollow in my back？ That's natural。
As now I stand； so stood I when a child；
A rosy； chubby boy！I am youthful to
A miracle！ My arm is firm as 'twas
At twenty。 Feel it！
True。 ＇Feeling SIR WILLIAM'S arm。＇ It is deal！
Sir Wil。 Oakoak；
Isn't it； Master Trueworth？ Thou hast known me
Ten years and upwards。 Thinkest my leg is shrunk？
True。 No。
Sir Wil。 No！ not in the calf？
True。 As big a calf
As ever！
Sir Wil。 Thank you； thank youI believe it！
When others waste； 'tis growing…time with me！
I feel it； Master Trueworth！ Vigour； sir；
In every joint of mecould run！could leap！
Why shouldn't I marry？ Knife and fork I play
Better than many a boy of twenty…five …
Why shouldn't I marry？ If they come to wine；
My brace of bottles can I carry home；
And ne'er a headache。 Death！ why shouldn't I marry？
True。 I see in nature no impediment。
Sir Wil。 Impediment？ She's all appliances！ …
And fortune's with me； too！ The Widow Green
Gives hints to me。 The pleasant Widow Green
Whose fortieth year； instead of autumn； brings；
A second summer in。 Odds bodikins；
How young she looks！ What life is in her eyes！
What ease is in her gait！while； as she walks；
Her waist； still tapering； takes it pliantly！
How lollingly she bears her head withal：
On this side nownow that！ When enters she
A drawing…room； what worlds of gracious things
Her curtsey says！she sinks with such a sway；
Greeting on either hand the company；
Then slowly rises to her state again！
She is the empress of the card…table！
Her hand and arm！Gods； did you see her deal …
With curved and pliant wrist dispense the pack；
Which； at the touch of her fair fingers fly！
How soft she speakshow very soft！ Her voice
Comes melting from her round and swelling throat；
Reminding you of sweetest； mellowest things …
Plums； peaches； apricots； and nectarines …
Whose bloom is poor to paint her cheeks and lips。
By Jove； I'll marry！
True。 You forget； Sir William；
I do not know the lady。
Sir Wil。 Great your loss。
By all the gods I'll marry！but my daughter
Must needs be married first。 She rules my house；
Would rule it still； and will not have me wed。
A clever； handsome； darling； forward minx！
When I became a widower； the reins
Her mother dropped she caught；a hoyden girl；
Nor； since； would e'er give up； howe'er I strove
To coax or catch them from her。 One way still
Or t'other she would keep themlaugh； pout； plead；
Now vanquish me with water； now with fire；
Would box my face； and； ere I well could ope
My mouth to chide her； stop it with a kiss！
The monkey！ What a plague she's to me！ How
I love her！ how I love the Widow Green！
True。 Then marry her！
Sir Wil。 I tell thee； first of all
Must needs my daughter marry。 See I not
A hope of that； she nought affects the sex：
Comes suitor after suitorall in vain。
Fast as they bow she curtsies； and says； 〃Nay！〃
Or she； a woman； lacks a woman's heart；
Or hath a special taste which none can hit。
True。 Or taste； perhaps； which is already hit。
Sir Wil。 Eh！how？
True。 Remember you no country friend；
Companion of her walksher squire to church；
Her beau whenever she went visiting …
Before she came to town？
Sir Wil。 No！
True。 None？art sure？
No playmate when she was a girl？
Sir Wil。 O！ ay！
That Master Wildrake； I did pray thee go
And wait for at the inn； but had forgotten。
Is he come？
True。 And in the house。 Some friends that met him；
As he alighted； laid strong hands upon Him；
And made him stop for dinner。 We had else
Been earlier with you。
Sir Wil。 Ha！ I am glad he is come。
True。 She may be smit with him。
Sir Wil。 As cat with dog！
True。 He heard her voice as we did mount the stairs；
And darted straight to join her。
Sir Wil。 You shall see
What wondrous calm and harmony take place；
When fire meets gunpowder！
Con。 ＇Without。＇ Who sent for you？
What made you come？
Wild。 ＇Without。＇ To see the town； not you！ A kiss！
Con。 I vow I'll not。
Wild。 I swear you shall。
Con。 A saucy cub！ I vow； I had as lief
Your whipper…in had kissed me。
Sir Wil。 Do you hear？
True。 I do。 Most pleasing discords！
＇Enter CONSTANCE and WILDRAKE。＇
Con。 Father； speak
To neighbour Wildrake！
Sir Wil。 Very glad to see him！
Wild。 I thank you； good Sir William！ Give you joy
Of your good looks！
Con。 What； Phoebe！Phoebe！Phoebe！
Sir Wil。 What wantest thou with thy lap…dog？
Con。 Only； sir；
To welcome neighbour Wildrake！ What a figure
To show himself in town！
Sir Wil。 Wilt hold thy peace？
Con。 Yes； if you'll lesson me to hol