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handsome peasant face wearing a compassionate expression； and the
good； ugly Mlle。 Durand； the governess； with her black eyebrows
meeting over a short thick nose and a complexion like pale brown
paper。 Of all the eyes turned towards the carriage； her good…
natured eyes only were dropping tears； and it was her sobbing
voice alone that broke the silence with an appeal to me：
〃N'oublie pas ton francais； mon cheri。〃 In three months； simply
by playing with us； she had taught me not only to speak French
but to read it as well。 She was indeed an excellent playmate。
In the distance； half way down to the great gates； a light； open
trap； harnessed with three horses in Russian fashion； stood drawn
up on one side with the police…captain of the district sitting in
it； the vizor of his flat cap with a red band pulled down over
his eyes。
It seems strange that he should have been there to watch our
going so carefully。 Without wishing to treat with levity the
just timidities of Imperialists all the world over； I may allow
myself the reflection that a woman； practically condemned by the
doctors； and a small boy not quite six years old could not be
regarded as seriously dangerous even for the largest of
conceivable empires saddled with the most sacred of
responsibilities。 And this good man； I believe； did not think so
either。
I learned afterwards why he was present on that day。 I don't
remember any outward signs； but it seems that； about a month
before； my mother became so unwell that there was a doubt whether
she could be made fit to travel in the time。 In this uncertainty
the Governor…General in Kiev was petitioned to grant her a
fortnight's extension of stay in her brother's house。 No answer
whatever was returned to this prayer； but one day at dusk the
police…captain of the district drove up to the house and told my
uncle's valet； who ran out to meet him； that he wanted to speak
with the master in private； at once。 Very much impressed （he
thought it was going to be an arrest） the servant； 〃more dead
than alive with fright；〃 as he related afterwards； smuggled him
through the big drawing…room； which was dark （that room was not
lighted every evening）； on tiptoe； so as not to attract the
attention of the ladies in the house； and led him by way of the
orangery to my uncle's private apartments。
The policeman； without any preliminaries； thrust a paper into my
uncle's hands。
〃There。 Pray read this。 I have no business to show this paper
to you。 It is wrong of me。 But I can't either eat or sleep with
such a job hanging over me。〃
That police…captain； a native of Great Russia； had been for many
years serving in the district。
My uncle unfolded and read the document。 It was a service order
issued from the Governor…General's secretariat； dealing with the
matter of the petition and directing the police…captain to
disregard all remonstrances and explanations in regard to that
illness either from medical men or others； 〃and if she has not
left her brother's house〃it went on to say〃on the morning of
the day specified on her permit； you are to despatch her at once
under escort； direct〃 （underlined） 〃to the prison…hospital in
Kiev； where she will be treated as her case demands。〃
〃For God's sake； Mr。 B。； see that your sister goes away
punctually on that day。 Don't give me this work to do with a
womanand with one of your family too。 I simply cannot bear to
think of it。〃
He was absolutely wringing his hands。 My uncle looked at him in
silence。
〃Thank you for this warning。 I assure you that even if she were
dying she would be carried out to the carriage。〃
〃Yesindeedand what difference would it maketravel to Kiev
or back to her husband。 For she would have to godeath or no
death。 And mind； Mr。 B。； I will be here on the day； not that I
doubt your promise； but because I must。 I have got to。 Duty。
All the same my trade is not fit for a dog since some of you
Poles will persist in rebelling； and all of you have got to
suffer for it。〃
This is the reason why he was there in an open three…horse trap
pulled up between the house and the great gates。 I regret not
being able to give up his name to the scorn of all believers in
the rights of conquest； as a reprehensibly sensitive guardian of
Imperial greatness。 On the other hand； I am in a position to
state the name of the Governor…General who signed the order with
the marginal note 〃to be carried out to the letter〃 in his own
handwriting。 The gentleman's name was Bezak。 A high dignitary；
an energetic official； the idol for a time of the Russian
Patriotic Press。
Each generation has its memories。
Chapter IV。
It must not be supposed that in setting forth the memories of
this half…hour between the moment my uncle left my room till we
met again at dinner； I am losing sight of 〃Almayer's Folly。〃
Having confessed that my first novel was begun in idlenessa
holiday taskI think I have also given the impression that it
was a much…delayed book。 It was never dismissed from my mind；
even when the hope of ever finishing it was very faint。 Many
things came in its way： daily duties； new impressions； old
memories。 It was not the outcome of a needthe famous need of
self…expression which artists find in their search for motives。
The necessity which impelled me was a hidden； obscure necessity；
a completely masked and unaccountable phenomenon。 Or perhaps
some idle and frivolous magician （there must be magicians in
London） had cast a spell over me through his parlour window as I
explored the maze of streets east and west in solitary leisurely
walks without chart and compass。 Till I began to write that
novel I had written nothing but letters and not very many these。
I never made a note of a fact； of an impression or of an anecdote
in my life。 The conception of a planned book was entirely
outside my mental range when I sat down to write； the ambition of
being an author had never turned up amongst these gracious
imaginary existences one creates fondly for oneself at times in
the stillness and immobility of a day…dream： yet it stands clear
as the sun at noonday that from the moment I had done blackening
over the first manuscript page of 〃Almayer's Folly〃 （it contained
about two hundred words and this proportion of words to a page
has remained with me through the fifteen years of my writing
life）； from the moment I had； in the simplicity of my heart