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〃Thereupon；〃 says Barnum； 〃when the minister had read the closing hymn； I walked up the pulpit stairs and handed him a written request； signed 'P。 T。 Barnum； connected with the circus； June 5； 1836；' to be permitted to reply to him。 He declined to notice it； and after the benediction I lectured him for not giving me an opportunity to vindicate myself and those with whom I was connected。 The affair created considerable excitement； and some of the members of the church apologized to me for their clergyman's ill behavior。 A similar affair happened afterward at Port Deposit； on the lower Susquehanna； and in this instance I addressed the audience for half an hour； defending the circus company against the attacks of the clergyman； and the people listened； though their pastor repeatedly implored them to go home。 Often have I collected our company on Sunday and read to them the Bible or a printed sermon； and one or more of the men frequently accompanied me to church。 We made no pretense of religion； but we were not the worst people in the world； and we thought ourselves entitled to at least decent treatment when we went to hear the preaching of the Gospel。〃
Turner； the proprietor of the circus； was a self…made man。 He had made himself rich through industry； as he believed any other man with common sense could do； and he was very proud of the fact。 He was also an inveterate practical joker； and once； at Annapolis； Maryland； he played upon Barnum a trick which came very near having a serious result。 They got there on Saturday night； and the next morning Barnum went out for a walk； wearing a fine new suit of black clothes。 As he passed through the bar…room and out of the hotel Turner said to some bystanders； who did not know Barnum：
〃I think it very singular that you permit that rascal to march your streets in open day。 It wouldn't be allowed in Rhode Island； and I suppose that is the reason the scoundrel has come down this way。〃
〃Why； who is he？〃 they demanded。
〃Don't you know？ Why； that is the Rev。 E。 K。 Avery； the murderer of Miss Cornell。〃
Instantly there was a rush of the whole crowd to the door； eager to get another look at Barnum； and uttering threats of vengeance。 This man Avery had only lately been tried in Rhode Island for the murder of Miss Cornell； whose dead body was discovered in a stack…yard； and though he was acquitted by the court everybody believed him guilty。 Accordingly； Barnum soon found himself overtaken and surrounded by a mob of one hundred or more and his ears saluted with such remarks as 〃the lecherous old hypocrite；〃 〃the sanctified murderer；〃 〃the black…coated villain；〃 〃lynch him；〃 〃tar and feather him；〃 and others still more harsh and threatening。 Then one man seized him by the collar； while others brought a fence rail and some rope。
〃Come；〃 said the man who collared him； 〃old chap； you can't walk any further； we know you； and as we always make gentlemen ride in these parts； you may just prepare to straddle that rail！〃
His surprise may be imagined。 〃Good heavens！〃 he exclaimed； as they all pressed around； 〃gentlemen； what have I done？〃
〃Oh； we know you；〃 exclaimed half a dozen voices； 〃you needn't roll your sanctimonious eyes； that game don't take in this country。 Come； straddle the rail； and REMEMBER THE STACK…YARD！〃
He grew more and more bewildered； he could not imagine what possible offence he was to suffer for； and he continued to exclaim； 〃Gentlemen； what have I done？ Don't kill me； gentlemen； but tell me what I have done。〃
〃Come； make him straddle the rail； we'll show him how to hang poor factory girls；〃 shouted a man in the crowd。
The man who had him by the collar then remarked 〃Come； MR。 AVERY； it's no use； you see； we know you； and we'll give you a touch of lynch law； and start you for home again。〃
〃My name is NOT Avery； gentlemen； you are mistaken in your man；〃 he exclaimed。
〃Come； come； none of your gammon； straddle the rail； Ephraim。〃
The rail was brought and Barnum was about to be placed on it； when the truth flashed upon him。
〃Gentlemen；〃 he exclaimed； 〃I am not Avery； I despise that villain as much as you can； my name is Barnum； I belong to the circus which arrived here last night； and I am sure Old Turner； my partner； has hoaxed you with this ridiculous story。〃
〃If he has we'll lynch him；〃 said one of the mob。
〃Well； he has； I'll assure you； and if you will walk to the hotel with me； I'll convince you of the fact。〃
This they reluctantly assented to； keeping； however； a close hand upon him。 As they walked up the main street； the mob received a re…enforcement of some fifty or sixty； and Barnum was marched like a malefactor up to the hotel。 Old Turner stood on the piazza ready to explode with laughter。 Barnum appealed to him for heaven's sake to explain this matter； that he might be liberated。 He continued to laugh； but finally told them 〃he believed there was some mistake about it。 The fact is；〃 said he； 〃my friend Barnum has a new suit of black clothes on and he looks so much like a priest that I thought he must be Avery。〃
The crowd saw the joke and seemed satisfied。 Barnum's new coat had been half…torn from his back； and he had been very roughly handled。 But some of the crowd apologized for the outrage； declaring that Turner ought to be served in the same way； while others advised Barnum to 〃get even with him。〃 Barnum was very much offended； and when the mob…dispersed he asked Turner what could have induced him to play such a trick。
〃My dear Mr。 Barnum；〃 he replied； 〃it was all for our good。 Remember； all we need to insure success is notoriety。 You will see that this will be noised all about town as a trick played by one of the circus managers upon the other； and our pavilion will be crammed to…morrow night。〃
It was even so； the trick was told all over town； and every one came to see the circus managers who were in a habit of playing practical jokes upon each other。 They had fine audiences while they remained at Annapolis； but it was a long time before Barnum forgave Turner for his rascally 〃joke。〃
CHAPTER VI。 INCIDENTS OF A CIRCUS TOUR。
BEATING A LANDLORDA JOKE ON TURNERBARNUM AS A PREACHER AND AS A NEGRO MINSTRELA BAD MAN WITH A GUNDEALING WITH A SHERIFF〃LADY HAYES〃AN EMBARASSED JUGGLERBARNUM AS A MATRIMONIAL AGENT。
At almost every place visited by the travelling company； some notable incident occurred。 At Hanover Court House； Virginia； for example； it was raining so heavily that they could not give a performance； and Turner therefore decided to start for Richmond immediately after dinner。 Their landlord； however； said that as their agent had engaged three meals and lodgings for the whole troupe； the whole bill must be paid whether they went then or stayed until next morning。 No compromise could be made with the stubborn fellow； and Turner was equally stubborn in his determination both to go at once and also to have the worth of his money。 The following programme was accordingly carried out； Turner insisting upon every detail：
Dinner was ordered at twelve o'clock and was duly prepared and eaten。 As soon as the table was cleared； supper was ordered； at half past twelve。 After eating as much of this as their dinner h