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〃He is certainly a most unaccountable man；〃 said Sir Charles。
〃I am glad； for my own sake； that he is not so black as he is
painted；〃 said Agatha。 〃You may believe every word of it； Mr。
Erskine。 Be sure to do as he tells you。 He is quite certain to be
right。〃
〃Pooh！〃 said Erskine； crumpling the telegram and thrusting it
into his pocket as if it were not worth a second thought。
Presently he slipped away； and did not reappear。 When they were
about to retire； Sir Charles asked a servant where he was。
〃In the library； Sir Charles； writing。〃
They looked significantly at one another and went to bed without
disturbing him。
CHAPTER XVIII
When Gertrude found herself beside Trefusis in the Pullman； she
wondered how she came to be travelling with him against her
resolution； if not against her will。 In the presence of two women
scrutinizing her as if they suspected her of being there with no
good purpose； a male passenger admiring her a little further off；
her maid reading Trefusis's newspapers just out of earshot； an
uninterested country gentleman looking glumly out of window； a
city man preoccupied with the 〃Economist；〃 and a polite lady who
refrained from staring but not from observing； she felt that she
must not make a scene； yet she knew he had not come there to hold
an ordinary conversation。 Her doubt did not last long。 He began
promptly； and went to the point at once。
〃What do you think of this engagement of mine？〃
This was more than she could bear calmly。 〃What is it to me？〃 she
said indignantly。 〃I have nothing to do with it。〃
〃Nothing！ You are a cold friend to me then。 I thought you one of
the surest I possessed。〃
She moved as if about to look at him； but checked herself； closed
her lips； and fixed her eyes on the vacant seat before her。 The
reproach he deserved was beyond her power of expression。
〃I cling to that conviction still； in spite of Miss Lindsay's
indifference to my affairs。 But I confess I hardly know how to
bring you into sympathy with me in this matter。 In the first
place； you have never been married； I have。 In the next； you are
much younger than I； in more respects than that of years。 Very
likely half your ideas on the subject are derived from fictions
in which happy results are tacked on to conditions very
ill…calculated to produce themwhich in real life hardly ever do
produce them。 If our friendship were a chapter in a novel； what
would be the upshot of it？ Why； I should marry you； or you break
your heart at my treachery。〃
Gertrude moved her eyes as if she had some intention of taking to
flight。
〃But our relations being those of real lifefar sweeter； after
allI never dreamed of marrying you； having gained and enjoyed
your friendship without that eye to business which our nineteenth
century keeps open even whilst it sleeps。 You； being equally
disinterested in your regard for me； do not think of breaking
your heart； but you are； I suppose； a little hurt at my
apparently meditating and resolving on such a serious step as
marriage with Agatha without confiding my intention to you。 And
you punish me by telling me that you have nothing to do with it
that it is nothing to you。 But I never meditated the step； and so
had nothing to conceal from you。 It was conceived and executed in
less than a minute。 Although my first marriage was a silly love
match and a failure； I have always admitted to myself that I
should marry again。 A bachelor is a man who shirks
responsibilities and duties； I seek them； and consider it my
duty； with my monstrous superfluity of means； not to let the
individualists outbreed me。 Still； I was in no hurry； having
other things to occupy me； and being fond of my bachelor freedom；
and doubtful sometimes whether I had any right to bring more
idlers into the world for the workers to feed。 Then came the
usual difficulty about the lady。 I did not want a helpmeet； I can
help myself。 Nor did I expect to be loved devotedly； for the race
has not yet evolved a man lovable on thorough acquaintance； even
my self…love is neither thorough nor constant。 I wanted a genial
partner for domestic business； and Agatha struck me quite
suddenly as being the nearest approach to what I desired that I
was likely to find in the marriage market； where it is extremely
hard to suit oneself； and where the likeliest bargains are apt to
be snapped up by others if one hesitates too long in the hope of
finding something better。 I admire Agatha's courage and
capability； and believe I shall be able to make her like me； and
that the attachment so begun may turn into as close a union as is
either healthy or necessary between two separate individuals。 I
may mistake her character； for I do not know her as I know you；
and have scarcely enough faith in her as yet to tell her such
things as I have told you。 Still； there is a consoling dash of
romance in the transaction。 Agatha has charm。 Do you not think
so？〃
Gertrude's emotion was gone。 She replied with cool scorn； 〃Very
romantic indeed。 She is very fortunate。〃
Trefusis half laughed； half sighed with relief to find her so
self…possessed。 〃It sounds likeand indeed isthe selfish
calculation of a disilluded widower。 You would not value such an
offer； or envy the recipient of it？〃
〃No；〃 said Gertrude with quiet contempt。
〃Yet there is some calculation behind every such offer。 We marry
to satisfy our needs； and the more reasonable our needs are； the
more likely are we to get them satisfied。 I see you are disgusted
with me； I feared as much。 You are the sort of woman to admit no
excuse for my marriage except lovepure emotional love；
blindfolding reason。〃
〃I really do not concern myself〃
〃Do not say so； Gertrude。 I watch every step you take with
anxiety； and I do not believe you are indifferent to the
worthiness of my conduct。 Believe me； love is an overrated
passion； it would be irremediably discredited but that young
people； and the romancers who live upon their follies； have a
perpetual interest in rehabilitating it。 No relation involving
divided duties and continual intercourse between two people can
subsist permanently on love alone。 Yet love is not to be despised
when it comes from a fine nature。 There is a man who loves you
exactly as you think I ought to love Agathaand as I don't love
her。〃
Gertrude's emotion stirred again； and her color rose。 〃You have
no right to say these things now；〃 she said。
〃Why may I not plead the cause of another？ I speak of Erskine。〃
Her color vanished； and he continued； 〃I want you to marry him。
When you are married you will understand me better； and our
friendship； shaken just now； will be deepened； for I dare assure
you； now that you can no longer misunderstand me； that no living
woman is dearer to me than you。 So much for the inevitable
selfish reason。 Erskine is a poor man； and in his comfortable
povertysave the marklies your salvation from the baseness of
marrying for wealth and position； a baseness of which women of
your class stand in constant peril。 They court it； you must shun
it。 The man is honorable and loves you； he is young； healthy； and
suitable。 What more do you think the world has to of