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conversation。 And I can never find repose when I know and feel
that on the other side of a wall several existences are
undergoing these regular eclipses of reason。
Why am I thus？ Who knows？ The cause of it is very simple perhaps。
I get tired very soon of everything that does not emanate from
me。 And there are many people in similar case。
We are； on earth； two distinct races。 Those who have need of
others； whom others amuse； engage soothe； whom solitude harasses；
pains； stupefies； like the movement of a terrible glacier or the
traversing of the desert； and those； on the contrary； whom others
weary； tire； bore； silently torture； whom isolation calms and
bathes in the repose of independency； and plunges into the humors
of their own thoughts。 In fine； there is here a normal； physical
phenomenon。 Some are constituted to live a life outside of
themselves； others； to live a life within themselves。 As for me；
my exterior associations are abruptly and painfully short…lived；
and； as they reach their limits； I experience in my whole body
and in my whole intelligence an intolerable uneasiness。
As a result of this； I became attached； or rather had become much
attached； to inanimate objects； which have for me the importance
of beings； and my house has or had become a world in which I
lived an active and solitary life； surrounded by all manner of
things； furniture； familiar knickknacks； as sympathetic in my
eyes as the visages of human beings。 I had filled my mansion with
them； little by little； I had adorned it with them； and I felt an
inward content and satisfaction； was more happy than if I had
been in the arms of a beloved girl； whose wonted caresses had
become a soothing and delightful necessity。
I had had this house constructed in the center of a beautiful
garden； which hid it from the public high…ways； and which was
near the entrance to a city where I could find； on occasion； the
resources of society； for which； at moments； I had a longing。 All
my domestics slept in a separate building； which was situated at
some considerable distance from my house； at the far end of the
kitchen garden； which in turn was surrounded by a high wall。 The
obscure envelopment of night； in the silence of my concealed
habitation； buried under the leaves of great trees； was so
reposeful and so delicious； that before retiring to my couch I
lingered every evening for several hours in order to enjoy the
solitude a little longer。
One day 〃Signad〃 had been played at one of the city theaters。 It
was the first time that I had listened to that beautiful；
musical； and fairy…like drama； and I had derived from it the
liveliest pleasures。
I returned home on foot with a light step； my head full of
sonorous phrases； and my mind haunted by delightful visions。 It
was night； the dead of night； and so dark that I could hardly
distinguish the broad highway； and consequently I stumbled into
the ditch more than once。 From the custom…house； at the barriers；
to my house； was about a mile； perhaps a little morea leisurely
walk of about twenty minutes。 It was one o'clock in the morning；
one o'clock or maybe half…past one； the sky had by this time
cleared somewhat and the crescent appeared； the gloomy crescent
of the last quarter of the moon。 The crescent of the first
quarter is that which rises about five or six o'clock in the
evening and is clear； gay； and fretted with silver； but the one
which rises after midnight is reddish； sad； and desolatingit is
the true Sabbath crescent。 Every prowler by night has made the same
observation。 The first； though slender as a thread； throws a faint；
joyous light which rejoices the heart and lines the ground with
distinct shadows； the last sheds hardly a dying glimmer； and is so
wan that it occasions hardly any shadows。
In the distance； I perceived the somber mass of my garden； and； I
know not why； was seized with a feeling of uneasiness at the idea
of going inside。 I slackened my pace； and walked very softly； the
thick cluster of trees having the appearance of a tomb in which
my house was buried。
I opened my outer gate and entered the long avenue of sycamores
which ran in the direction of the house； arranged vault…wise like
a high tunnel； traversing opaque masses； and winding round the
turf lawns； on which baskets of flowers； in the pale darkness；
could be indistinctly discerned。
While approaching the house； I was seized by a strange feeling。 I
could hear nothing； I stood still。 Through the trees there was
not even a breath of air stirring。 〃What is the matter with me？〃
I said to myself。 For ten years I had entered and re…entered in
the same way； without ever experiencing the least inquietude。 I
never had any fear at nights。 The sight of a man； a marauder； or
a thief would have thrown me into a fit of anger； and I would
have rushed at him without any hesitation。 Moreover； I was
armedI had my revolver。 But I did not touch it； for I was
anxious to resist that feeling of dread with which I was seized。
What was it？ Was it a presentimentthat mysterious presentiment
which takes hold of the senses of men who have witnessed
something which； to them； is inexplicable？ Perhaps？ Who knows？
In proportion as I advanced； I felt my skin quiver more and more；
and when I was close to the wall； near the outhouses of my large
residence； I felt that it would be necessary for me to wait a few
minutes before opening the door and going inside。 I sat down；
then； on a bench； under the windows of my drawing…room。 I rested
there； a little disturbed； with my head leaning against the wall；
my eyes wide open； under the shade of the foliage。 For the first
few minutes； I did not observe anything unusual around me； I had
a humming noise in my ears； but that has happened often to me。
Sometimes it seemed to me that I heard trains passing； that I
heard clocks striking； that I heard a multitude on the march。
Very soon； those humming noises became more distinct； more
concentrated； more determinable； I was deceiving myself。 It was
not the ordinary tingling of my arteries which transmitted to my
ears these rumbling sounds； but it was a very distinct； though
confused； noise which came； without any doubt whatever； from the
interior of my house。 Through the walls I distinguished this
continued noise；I should rather say agitation than noise；an
indistinct moving about of a pile of things； as if people were
tossing about； displacing； and carrying away surreptitiously all
my furniture。
I doubted； however； for some considerable time yet； the evidence
of my ears。 But having placed my ear against one of the
outhouses； the better to discover what this strange disturbance
was； inside my house； I became convinced； certain； that something
was taking place in my residence which was altogether abnormal
and incomprehensible。 I had no fear； but I washow shall I
express itparalyzed by astonishment。 I did not draw my
revolver； knowing very well that there was no need of my doing
so。
I listened a long time； but could come to no resolution； my mind
being quite clear； though in myself I was naturally anxious。 I
got up and waited； listening always to the noise； which gradu