按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
〃Molly Peterkin？〃 repeated Maria inquiringly。 〃Why； how absurd！ And； after all； what is the matter with the girl？〃 Dropping the curtain； she came over to the fire； and sat listening attentively while Miss Saidie told； in spasmodic jerks and pauses； the foolish story of Will's marriage。
〃Your grandpa will never forgive himnever； never。 He has turned him out for good and all； and he talks now of leaving every cent of his money to foreign missions。〃
〃Well； we'll see；〃 said Maria soothingly。 〃I'll go over there to… morrow and talk with Will； and then I'll try to bring grandfather to some kind of reason。 He can't let them starve； rich as he is； there's no sense in thatand if the worst comes； I can at least share the little I have with them。 It may supply them with bread； if Molly will undertake to churn her own butter。〃
〃Then your money went； too？〃
〃The greater part of it。 Jack was fond of wild schemes； you know。 I left it in his hands。〃 She had pronounced the dead man's name so composedly that Miss Saidie； after an instant's hesitation； brought herself to an allusion to the girl's loss。
〃How you must miss him； dear；〃 she ventured timidly； 〃even if he wasn't everything he should have been to you； he was still your husband。〃
〃Yes； he was my husband；〃 assented Maria quietly。
〃You were so brave and so patient； and you stuck by him to the last； as a wife ought to do。 Then thar's not even a child left to you now。〃
Maria turned slowly toward her and then looked away again into the fire。 The charred end of a lightwood knot had fallen on the stones； and； picking it up； she threw it back into the flames。 〃For a year before his death his mind was quite gone；〃 she said in a voice that quivered slightly； 〃he had to be taken to an asylum； but I went with him and nursed him till he died。 There were times when he would allow no one else to enter his room or even bring him his meals。 I have sat by him for two days and nights without sleeping； and though he did not recognise me； he would not let me stir from my place。〃
〃And yet he treated you very badlyeven his family said so。〃
〃That is all over now； and we were both to blame。 I owed him reparation； and I made it； thank God； at the last。〃
As she raised her bare arms to the cushioned back of her chair Miss Saidie caught a glimpse of a deep white scar which ran in a jagged line above her elbow。
〃Oh； it is nothing； nothing；〃 said Maria hastily； clasping her hands again upon her knees。 〃That part of my life is over and done with and may rest in peace。 I forgave him then； and he forgives me now。 One always forgives when one understands； you know； and we both understand to…dayhe no less than I。 The chief thing was that we made a huge； irretrievable mistakethe mistake that two people make when they think that love can be coddled and nursed like a domestic petwhen they forget that it goes wild and free and comes at no man's call。 Folly like that is its own punishment； I suppose。〃
〃My dear； my dear；〃 gasped Miss Saidie； in awe…stricken sympathy before the wild remorse in Maria's voice。
〃I did my duty； as you call it； I even clung to it desperately； and； much as I hated it； I never rebelled for a single instant。 The nearest I came to loving him； I think； was when； after our terrible life together； he lay helpless for a year and I was with him day and night。 If I could have given him my strength then； brain and body； I would have done it gladly； and that agonised compassion was the strongest feeling I ever had for him。〃 She broke off for a long breath； and sat looking earnestly at the amazed little woman across from her。 〃You could never understand！〃 she exclaimed impetuously； 〃but I must tell youI must tell you because I can't live with you day after day and know that there is an old dead lie between us。 I hate lies； I have had so many of them； and I shall speak the truth hereafter； no matter what comes of it。 Anything is better than a long； wearing falsehood； or than those hideous little shams that we were always afraid to touch for fear they would melt and show us our own nakedness。 That is what I loathe about my life； and that is what I've done with now forever。 I am myself now for the first time since I was born； and at last I shall let my own nature teach me how to live。〃
Her intense pallor was illumined suddenly by a white flame； whether from the leaping of some inner emotion or from the sinking firelight which blazed up fitfully Miss Saidie could not tell。 As she turned her head with an impatient movement her black hair slipped its heavy coil and spread in a shadowy mass upon her bared shoulders。
〃I'm sure I don't know how it is；〃 said Miss Saidie； wiping her eyes。 〃But I can't see that it makes any difference whether you were what they call in love or not； so long as you were a good； well…behaved wife。 I don't think a man troubles himself much about a woman's heart after he's put his wedding ring on her finger； and though I know； of course； that thar's a lot of nonsense spoken in courtship； it seems to me they mostly take it out in talking。 The wives that I've seen are generally as anxious about thar setting hens as they are about thar husband's hearts； and I reckon things are mighty near the same the world over。〃
Without noticing her； Maria went on feverishly； speaking so low at times that the other almost lost the words。
〃It is such a relief to let it all out；〃 she said； with a long； sighing breath； 〃and oh！ if I had loved him it would have been so differentso different。 Then I might have saved him； for what evil is strong enough to contend against a love which would have borne all things； have covered all things？〃
Rising from her chair； she walked rapidly up and down； and pausing at last beside the window； lifted the curtain and looked out into the night。
〃I might have saved him； I know it now；〃 she repeated slowly： 〃or had it been otherwise； even in madness I would not have loosened my arms； and my service would have been the one passionate delight left in my life。 They could never have torn him from my bosom then； and yet as it wasas it was〃 She turned quickly； and； coming back； laid her hand on Miss Saidie's arm。 〃It is such a comfort to talk； dear Aunt Saidie；〃 she added； 〃even though you don't understand half that I say。 But you are goodso good； and now if you'll lend me a nightgown I'll go to bed and sleep until my trunks come in the morning。〃 Her voice had regained its old composure； and Miss Saidie； looking back as she went for the gown； saw that she had begun quietly to braid her hair。
CHAPTER III。 The Day Afterward
When Maria awoke； the sun was full in her eyes； and somewhere on the lawn outside the first bluebird was whistling。 With a start； she sprang out of bed and dressed quickly by the wood fire which Malindy had lighted。 Then； before going downstairs； she raised the window and leaned out into the freshness of the morning； where a white mist glimmered in the hollows of the March landscape。 In the distance she saw the smoking chimneys of the Blake cottage； very faint among the leafless trees； and nearer at hand men were moving back and forth in her grandfather's fields。 Six years ago she would have found little beaut